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Self Help Creativity

LAELAPS A magical dog which was destined never to surrender a chase. It was first bestowed on Europa by Zeus. Zeus placed his canines amongst the stars as the constellations Canis Major and Minor to play out the chase unresolved for eternity. (Hyginus 2.35) (For more info click on the photo. It will open in a new window.

We recently discovered this and had to share it. (reprinted with permission)

PBS' 'This Emotional Life': Paul Allen's Call For Emotional Health

A few years ago, I visited an Ivy League school to learn about recent discoveries in the fields of science and medicine. The most striking thing I heard wasn't about cutting-edge research, but about the state of mental health among students on campus: one in four took anti-depressants in order to function at school.

Even more troubling: if your son or daughter is in college in the United States, the chances are one in 10 that he or she will seriously consider suicide.

As I considered what a stumbling block emotional turmoil can be in the life of a promising young student, I realized we all know someone -- a family member, a friend, even ourselves -- who faces emotional challenges and needs help.

It's not always easy to find effective help. Part of the reason is that some of us look for a quick fix from the largely unregulated "get happy" industry. We are inundated by self-help books, films, shows, infomercials, seminars, and mega-events promising happiness in just three easy steps.

We are told to get in touch with our inner core, embrace a few "truths" and we'll be free of ills and insecurities. Think positive thoughts. Lose weight. Make money. Save money. Find love. Get married. Act young. Lose weight, again.

Research shows that no more than five percent of what's offered by the $10 billion-a-year for-profit self-help industry will work.

The good news, I learned in producing This Emotional Life, a three-part series that aired on PBS this week, is that effective, proven, help is out there. Science and research can put us on a more informed path to emotional health and well-being.

For two years we explored where our happiness comes from, what we can do to find more of it and how we can better cope with emotional issues.

The real-life stories in the series are powerful, honest and complex: Can an adopted child who spent years in an orphanage learn to form healthy attachments with others? Can newlyweds survive when "happily ever after" quickly turns to infidelity? How does a woman stricken with cancer, a young man confined to a wheelchair, or a prisoner of war find courage, fulfillment and a positive and complete emotional life?

Those compelling stories are combined with the latest scientific information in psychology and neuroscience and anecdotes from well-known musicians, actors and others. (If John McEnroe isn't an expert on anger, who is?)

In addition to the documentary, the project includes a website at with broad and substantive content about emotional health and related issues. There are blogs by a variety of experts, including writers, researchers and mental health professionals. There is a list of more than 2,500 resources with information from trusted sources such as the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration and the National Alliance on Mental Illness. You can also find other people in your area who are interested in getting together to talk about emotional health.

And if you missed the series during broadcast, you can watch full episodes at the website until January 20.

Through producing this project we learned that companionship is a basic need for human beings. Beyond the necessities of food, water, and shelter, a key to maintaining emotional and physical well-being -- from our first to our last breath -- resides in our ability to positively connect with people. The nature of our earliest relationships and experiences actually affects the way our brains grow.

One question scientists still hope to answer is whether there's a period of time where children must receive a certain kind of emotional input for their brains -- and, by extension, their social lives -- to develop normally. Regardless of the answer, parents and caregivers must recognize the long-term importance of forming a positive social and emotional environment for infants and children.

We also learned a great deal about fear, anxiety, anger and grief. These emotions can threaten relationships and cause us physical harm. Stress is linked to the six leading causes of death: heart disease, cancer, lung ailments, accidents, cirrhosis of the liver, and suicide.

Scientists are learning a great deal about the importance of individual resiliency in managing difficult situations and experiences. Recent studies of soldiers returning from war have been particularly enlightening as to the importance of this human quality to emotional health.

There are about 300,000 Iraq and Afghanistan military veterans suffering from posttraumatic stress disorder. And up to 20 percent of those still in combat will return to their families with combat-related stress disorders, according to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs.

The challenges facing military families and parents of infants are the two areas that I feel are most in need of deeper attention. Outreach programs have been launched and if you need help you can get information on the website.

In the last decade, researchers have learned about the mysteries of emotions and the forces that shape them. There are no magic fixes. But there is hope and help for those who take a thoughtful approach to a balanced emotional life. Looking for important answers is the first step. This Emotional Life tries to find those answers in the right places, which is the best step.

Philanthropist Paul Allen, co-founder of Microsoft, is the founder and chairman of Vulcan Productions, Inc., an independent film production company. This Emotional Life aired this week on PBS stations nationwide.

Self Help Exercises for Creativity and Mental Health

Creating Creativity

What in the Bleep is Creativity?

The great thing about defining creativity is that you get to define it.

Getting started...

Have you heard of speed writing and unconscious writing?

This is when you want to dig deeper and reach the child within or the unconscious. This helps you to discover what you really think versus what you have been taught to think.

Speed writing can also be useful as prelude to any kind of writing even if it's technical or research writing.

Try the following helpful exercises.

Speed Writing

With paper and pen or Word document at hand:

Pick a topic.

Set your timer for 5 minutes

Write everything that comes to your mind about Defining Creativity (without thinking) until the timer sounds off.

Ring, ring, buzz, buzz!

Read your definition of Creativity.

Does your definition of creativity leave you out?

If so, tear your paper into tiny little pieces and throw it into your cat's litter box. He won't mind and he'll treat it with the respect that it deserves. You can also attach your paper to a balloon and set it free, flush it, burn it, or play air basket ball with it. Just destroy it.

Creative World

This is an exercise that Bobby and I learned to do as comics. We always carried pocket size notebook and pen with us. As we thought of jokes or experienced funny situations we'd note it.

Now let's do it with creating our Creative World. Always make sure that you have a notebook and pen with you on your person. Whenever you find something that you actually enjoy or like write it down.

Getting to know yourself

This is not a to do list or even a life journal. These are ideas, things, concepts, places, careers, anything thing that makes you smile. This actually becomes your Creative Journal. Do not worry if it's original or creative enough. If you like it it's creative.

The Art of Creating

Find a comfortable place where you will not be disturbed.

Close your eyes.

Take 3 deep breaths in through your nose to a count of 3.

Hold each breath to a count of 2.

Release through your mouth on a count of 3.

If you have allergies or a stuffy nose just breath in and out through your mouth.

Now begin picturing your "Perfect Creative World"

With your eyes closed begin mentally creating your world.

What does your world look like?

Mentally place the things in your Creative World that you have jotted down on your "Creative List" do this by memory - do not look at it. Do not worry or scold your self if you do not remember everything.

Mentally put everything in your creative world that you like and enjoy.

Now place your self as the creative being that you are.

What are you doing?

How do you look?

What is your attitude?

Who and what are with you?

If things seep in that you do not want just blow them away with your breath.

Breathe in what you love and breathe out what you do not want.

Once you feel happy in your creative world open your eyes.

Guess what.... You are Creative!!!!

If you'd like to go a step further make a creativity poster.

Simply draw, doodle, cut photos out of magazines, and paste, color, and draw on it. Keep it in front of you as a reminder of your creativeness and creative aspirations.

Keep it up. Please don't think of this as a one time thing. You are a work- in- progress and your creative likes, dislikes, and goals will change over time.

We suggest to make a Creative poster once a year.

Keep your Creative Journal with you always and try to write in it daily or at least weekly. Remember you are just adding things that you like and that interest you. You may also draw and add photos. Whatever you like.

Building Your Creative World is aligned with Focused Meditation. Try to do this for at least 5 minutes a day when you first wake up or as you drift off to sleep.

We hope that if you are searching for answers that you will ask and if you are a coaching purveyor in the fields of creativity coaching, mental health, communication or a related field that you will share your experience and knowledge.

If you are under 18 years old please get your parent or guardians permission before calling.

Click the links below to find out more about us and where you can find us on the web.

The Torn Heart Exercise

Cut out a heart shape from construction paper. Medium sized should do. You may dress it up with sparkles, sticker or calligraphy.

Anything that makes you feel that it is beautiful.

Now put it down on a table. Take out your note book and pen.

Begin writing all of the negative things that you say to yourself on a daily or weekly basis. Set your timer to 5 minutes: Speed write every negative that comes to mind. You may follow some general negatives below that fit you or write your own.

Ready set go...

I'm stupid

I'm ugly

I'm not motivated

I don't deserve it

I'm not educated

I'm not pretty enough

My parents destroyed my life

They are out to get me

I just don't fit in

I'm odd

I'm lazy

I can't....

I don't look good in anything

Her marriage is great and mine sucks.

I'm just a loser magnet.

I attract the wrong kind of people.

I have emotional problems

I'm out of control

I'm bi-polar (when you have not actually been diagnosed with this horrible disease.)

I can't help it

I can't help myself

She has everything and I have nothing

Why can't I be more like him

Mommy loves him more than me

I never had parents

I was abused by my parents so I can't...

I'm trash.

I blew my opportunities a long time ago

I was dropped on my head as a baby

I'm just a loser

I'm a bum

Nothing ever works out for me so why bother?

I'm too old

I'm too young

I'm too too

I'm not likable

I'm not sociable

She slept with him or her to get that promotion

I'm too moral

I'm not moral enough

They just don't like me.

No one likes me... Think I'm gonna eat some worms...

We're all going to die and no one is taking anything with them so why bother.

I'd rather die

The government won't help me

My government helped me too much...

She won't let me do it

He won't let me do it

I'm a victim

Everyone feels sorry for me.

No one will help me

Time!

Now take your beautiful heart and hold it up to eye level. As you read your list tear a little bit of the heart off until you have completed your list of negative words.

What is left of your heart?

Not very pretty is it?

Do you want to put the pieces back together?

You can try but it will never look the same. Sometimes pieces just can't be put back together.

Could you create a new heart and keep those negative words out of your mind and vocabulary?

We think that you can. We believe in you.

Sometimes we know what to do but for some reason we just aren't doing it. We want a little help. Please see our links and more about creativity coaches below.

Feeling Words

Fine and OK are not feeling words. We've grown so accustomed to these automated and politically correct words that, many of us have lost touch with our own feelings.

Check in with yourself everyday and every night.

Simply ask yourself or each other how you are feeling. No explanations. Just one word and that feeling is accepted without any prying or trying to fix.

So, how are you feeling?

You answer:___________

Angry:

Mad, Irritable, Hostile, Annoyed, Enraged, Furious, Frustrated, Bitter, Steamed, Violent, Resentful and Heated.

Sad:

Downhearted, Depressed, Low, Blue, Tearful, Discouraged, Grieving, Hurt, Lost, Sick, Unhappy and Tearful.

Confused:

Perplexed, Puzzled, Bewildered, Embarrassed, Scattered, Uncomfortable, Conflicted, Unsettled, Muddled, Disoriented, Alone and Rattled.

Happy:

Joyful, Delighted, Glad, Cheerful, Excited, Ecstatic, Proud, Relived, Thrilled, Energetic, Playful and Content.

Scared:

Apprehensive, Fearful, Terrified, Alarmed, Afraid, Intimidated, Anxious, Paranoid, Panicked, Nervous, Insecure and Startled.

Are you Aware of Your Feelings?

List some situations in the past when you have been aware of feelings. Take your time. Work to remember what your physical responses may have been in each situation.

1. Identify three situations in the past month when you felt happy.

___________________________________________

____________________________________________

2. Identify three situations in the past month when you felt sad.

______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

3. Identify three situations in the past month when you felt afraid.

________________________________________________

4. List three situations in the past month when you felt angry.

_________________________________________________

__________________________________________________

5. Which one of these was the easiest? The most difficult? Do you know why?

___________________________________________________

6. Identify three things about your friend or partner that you really like.

_____________________________________________________

______________________________________________________

We suggest filling this out at the end of each month.

Feel free to print it out and share.

More self-help exercises

Answer these questions everyday before you go to work.

What are you passionate about right now?

What specifically about that makes you happy?

How does that make you feel?

Give detail. Fine and OK are not answers. See the chart for "feeling descriptions" on the "Self Help Creativity" link below.

Now, close your eyes and visualize what used to make you passionate. See it clearly in your minds eye. Now replay it in your mind and fix, change or resolve whatever is making you feel burnt out.

Creative Burnout

Is there a way that old dreams could be utilized in a marketable way today?

If you achieve your goal how will it make you feel?

If you do not achieve your goal how will it make you feel?

More coming soon.

Relationship (Lovers) Burnout

Close your eyes

Take 3 deep breathes in through your mouth and out through your nose.

Clinch your body parts, hold for a count of 3 and then gently release.

Visualize when the two of you first met?

Where were you?

what were the two of you wearing?

What did you do?

Did you feel excited, aroused or happy?

Did you seem to make each other laugh?

What brought the two of you together?

Allow yourself to feel those feelings.

Smile

Allow the problems to seep in and resolve them one by one?

Is it possible to resolve all of them? It's up to you.

If you did resolve them how would it make you feel?

If you didn't resolve them how would it make you feel?

Do you think that you could ever get the good feelings that you once had for your partner back?

If so, is it worth working on for you?

Open your eyes and breath.The Torn Heart Exercise -Understanding negative self-talk.

(The following can also be used for kids. Read aloud from a (age appropriate) story book that focuses on insults or putting others down. As you read each "put down" have the child tear off a piece of the heart. Then follow the same steps.